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20 April 2006

Pinkerton's Rules For Living

Naps are good.

Mom is good...even if she is hairless.

The sky could fall at any minute. When in doubt sit under something. Beds are good. Chairs are good. Bed trays are the best, they sit up high so you can see everything. Plus they give you that nice secure feeling of something over your head.

Warm french fries are very good.

Looking outside is good.

Being outside...not so much.

Naps are medicine

Hands are scary.

Wind is scary.

Vacuum cleaners are scary.

People are scary . . . and not that attractive.

Other cats are scary. Watch them till they go away or growl if they don't and run. This is also a good time to sit under something

Little people are evil.  They have loud high voices and grabby hands. Avoid at all costs. If Mom is there ignore them or growl. If Mom is away attack attack attack and then go sit under something. Remember to punish mom when she gets back for leaving you alone.

Naps = gorgeous me.

Towels are a good place to sit.

Bathtubs are fun. Baths are evil. Avoid at all costs. If you can't, resist resist resist. When resistance is futile, go to your happy place until it's over. Then go sit under something while you dry. Remember to punish mom for getting you wet.

Toilets are fun. Falling in isn't.

Bugs are fun. Small bugs.

String is fun . . . but don't eat it. Remember what happened that one time. Eww.

Staring is fun.

Naps are fun.

A food dish less than a quarter full is unacceptable.

Too much icky in the litter box is unacceptable.

To much hair on favorite sitting towel is unacceptable. It should also smell freshly laundered.

Being told to sit on favorite sitting towel is unacceptable, resist resist resist.

Get mom to rub your head while you eat. This is good.

Get mom to sing and rub your head. This is good.

Get mom to brush your head as much as possible, back also good. Brushing tummy is unacceptable, resist, resist resist.

Nap on favorite sitting towel, under the bed tray after strenuous resistance.

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